“Lets all lift our right hand in the air” aka Grammy Performance Roundup

Well ladies and gentleman, Sunday night was the long awaited Grammys and I’d like to blog about the award show which I call “95 % music 5% awards.” 

Tribute to Aretha Franklin: And so started the performances where everyone’s right hand lifted in some sort of bizarre tribute, “lets see if I can reach this high note way.” Xtina had a lot to make up for after her disastrous super bowl national anthem line flubbage, but she did an ok job, although of all those who were there to present for Aretha I found her to be the least intelligible. J-Hudson was awesome, as usual, and her and Yolanda Adams were probably the only two divas who could muster up some Aretha-esque respect.

Gaga: Yes, you all know I love Gaga, and her wackidoodle antics did not disappoint. While last year she performed my favorite of her songs Speechless this year she followed up with her new single Born This Way. Gaga used minimal nude colored outfits and African dance to tell a tale of an animalistic person who should be happy with whom they are. Note* all of gaga's dancers, and gaga ended the dance/song with a right arm in the air and hand forming a claw!

Miranda Lambert: Oh Lord. I do not like country music. Yes there are some people who are amazing no matter the genre (Carrie Underwood, Dolly Parton, Big and Rich), but Miranda Lambert is not one of them. Her performance was so boring and bland, and it really made me question why she won the Grammy at all.

Muse: What rebellious fun! Every time I hear the song Uprising I can actually imagine myself sticking it to the man just a little bit. Their performance featured super cool on-screen graphics (including a hoard of cartoon fists in the air), as well as a bunch of people actually banging on the stage carrying bats, fire, and other instruments of destruction. While at first I thought they were random people on the stage that needed to be escorted off by security, I was informed by my husband that this was part of “the act.” It was cool but also distracting from the actual performance.

B.O.B, Bruno Mars, and Janelle Monae: This was probably my second favorite performance of the night. Yes it even outweighed Gaga’s crazy performance.  The three “new talents” began their performance with a sparse version of Nothin on You, which I didn’t actually care for. Shortly after, they shifted into a black and white Doo Wop version of Grenade which was in my opinion better than the hokey original Then came a crazy off the wall performance of Janelle’s hit Cold War which basically proved her mad crazy dance skills and fierceness on stage. All in all- awesome. which was in my opinion better than the hokey original. Then came a crazy off the wall performance of Janelle’s hit

Justin Bieber, Jaden Smith, Usher: 1) JB is crazy talented, I don’t care what any haters say 2) he was robbed for best new artist 3) Jaden Smith would never have been a popular person if it hadn’t been for his parents- that being said, I found it momentous that Jaden rapped at the Grammys when the first hip hop/rap award ever given at the Grammys was to his daddy (and jazzy Jeff). 4) Dear Usher, you have many other hits that aren’t as obnoxiously annoying as OMG, please, I am begging you to sing one of those next time, thanks.

Mumford and Sons, The Avett Brothers, and Bob Dylan: Ok so Mumford and Sons are one of my favorite new bands and their performance did not disappoint. Yes, everyone was wondering if they were going to play their F*bomb filled song Little Lion Man but they chose their song The Cave instead, and played it with a Banjo! Genius. Next the Avett brothers continued the Bluegrass/Rock vibe and ushered in a very old frail looking Bob Dylan, who, while he has definitely sounded better (was that the sound editing at the Grammys fault) can still rock.

Lady Antebellum: Their performance bored me so much within the first minute and half that it was torturous to watch through the entire thing. Why, when this group sounds like they belong as wedding or cruise ship singers (at best), did they take home most of the Grammys?!

Cee Lo Green, Gwyneth Paltrow, and the singing puppets: Ok, by far, my favorite performance of the night. Not only did I squeal with girlish delight when I saw that Cee Lo was paying homage to Elton John’s appearance on the Muppet Show(in costume and with actual puppets), but I was also amazed at how freaking talented Gwyneth really is. Yes, she proved herself on Glee but she is just so darn perfect in every way (even with your right arm all the way up)!

John Mayer, Norah Jones, and Keith Urban: This was probably the most minimalist performance of the night but that is what made it so classic. Yes, I was momentarily confused as to why Johnny Depp was playing Joleen, but then I realized, oh man John Mayer really needs a haircut! Taking one of the simpler, yet excellent melodies Dolly has to offer this trio really nailed it.

Rhianna, Eminem, Skylar Grey and Dr. Dre: Ok first of all Rhianna has some cojones for singing Love the Way You Lie Part II the song Skylar Grey wrote (for herself) in front of the world, and while Skylar was actually on stage! Either way she was awesome. Next Eminem rapped with the ferocious attitude we have all come to know and love full of throbbing neck veins and red face. Once Dr. Dre came out and everyone went crazy I realized that yes, Dr. Dre is pretty old (at 45) and he doesn’t have the same vigor and excitement he used to, but his music is still great.

Katy Perry: Katy Started slow with her song Not like the Movies with footage from her wedding to Russell Brand. I really hope those two kooks stay together because otherwise she will have to remember this awkward footage forever. She finished with her single Teenage Dream (and awkward right arm in the air), and quick- cue footage of celebrities signing along with her!

Mick Jagger: I love the Stones, and love crazy Mick Jagger, and yes he didn’t really do Solomon Burke’s Everybody Needs Somebody to Love Justice, but he did rock out and get the audience on their feet. Like he does best.

Barbara Streisand: Barbara fans rejoice! Barb sang with her signature pauses and flair for the dramatics, but the song lacked the muster of her usually powerful numbers. She did get a standing ovation at the end, but any other performer performing the dreary Evergreen probably would not have.

Rhianna and Drake: Why Rhianna you little minx. Showing your sexy side with Drake on What’s My Name the two youthful singers injected a little dose of sex appeal and heat into the Grammys which had been missing since the earlier numbers of the evening.

Arcade Fire: AF performed one of my least favorites of their songs Month of May However they definitely added an indie rock vibe that had been missing from the show altogether. Plus props to them for using those crazy BMX bikers in their number. Also congrats AF on the win in the best album category, it was definitely a much deserved award!

So what were your thoughts on the performances? Missed the Grammys? Click here to see all of the Grammy performances.